Today's Email

I receive about six hundred emails daily. (It’s a rare day when spam reaches me, thankfully.) This is not a big deal; it’s just part of my job, which I know is remarkably easy. Some people have to do actual work like dealing with the public, or chasing children around all day, or lifting heavy things. I mostly sit in front of a bunch of computer monitors looking for interesting information and identifying mispriced securities. I read a lot of stuff, some of which comes to me via email. It’s terribly exciting and glamorous -- you can be jealous for a minute as long as you repent.

There is a lot of dross among the email. About half of it gets quickly skimmed and deleted. Some can be dealt with via monosyllabic response. A small amount of it requires thought, or analysis, or adds a piece to some information puzzle with which I’m struggling. Those are good emails. My favorites though are the ones that make me smile. For your (ok, really for my) amusement, are excerpts from two messages I received today. These are, I promise, verbatim quotes.

“Thanks again for bring [sic] my pants ! !”

“Hardest coal to get is met coal, dangerous and gassy (sounds like my uncle)”

I haven’t yet decided which of these is better, so I’d appreciate your views in the comments. If it’s helpful I can provide context, but it would not make either line more intelligible or less amusing.