One of The Many Signs I Am Old

A natural part of aging is being surpassed by the younger generation. I understand and accept this. While serving with the young men I realized that most of them were faster on a basketball court than I was, could eat more ice cream than me, and had the capacity to stay up far later. I was ok with all of this because they were teenagers and I was old.

Unfortunately, this trend has now extended to my own children. Allow me to explain:

This weekend, one of my girls wanted to play Webkinz online and I agreed. She choose a game in which you control a polar bear sledding down a mountain. Easy game - push a button to make the character jump over obstacles. The more obstacles you clear the more points you earn. You can earn extra points by increasing the difficulty at higher speeds and hitting some ramps. Really simple. I have been known to enjoy a video game from time to time, so I "helped" her get started. After figuring out the timing I was scoring ~750 points per game. I was totally rocking the sledding polar bear! At about 750 points I'd crash into a tree every time and figured it must be the end of the game.

At this point I got distracted with the baby for a few minutes and left the room. You can imagine my surprise when I returned to find that my daughter had scored 1,200ish points. I took my turn and crashed into the usual tree. On her next turn she put up around 2,000 points. Me: crash into tree. Her: over my tree and a couple more for good measure. I knew where the tree was and figured out a strategy to clear it. Still crashed. We finally moved on to a new game when she posted over 3,000 points. I never did jump over that stupid tree. Must be because I'm old.

Did I mention that Caroline was the daughter in my anecdote? Yeah, she's three.

...and the winner is...

Robert, for his correct guess of the most amusing line in Brave Sir Robin. Lisa also correctly guessed, but as there is only one can of Spam available she, along with the rest of us, will have to wait until the next contest to try again.

Congratulations Mo. I hope Jenni has some delicious meal ideas involving Spam.

The First of Today's Two Announcements

And That Makes You....?

The following comments were just made by some tech support guys describing one of their colleagues:

He's a few fries short of a Happy Meal.
Not the brightest tool in the shed.
He's flying without the pilot light on.

I understand their point and can see through the error in comment two. I'm totally lost on which idiom the third comment was meant to be. Anyone help?

Here Comes The Sun

I think I've mentioned before that I find science fascinating despite my complete lack of ability in the subject. Partly I enjoy always finding something new to learn. Discovering images like this is another reason:


That's the sun in our own solar system with the moon eclipsing it. Here's the explanation for this picture.

Stupid Blogger

I just finished an entry I began earlier in the week and for some reason Blogger dated it for Monday, making it appear as an old post.

If you have as much ADD as I do, you don't look beyond the first post in a blog to see whether you're up to date or not. Since I don't want anyone to miss the IMPORTANT CONTEST I announce, please read I'm Not Dead Yet Either below.

Thank you.

A Mystery Solved

There has been much speculation about what it will take to get Ben blogging again. Today the mystery ends.

After painstaking research and untold expense I have cracked the code. Although Ben is too busy to read Delicious Animals, I'm sure his people will inform him of my accomplishment so that he can resume his efforts. (Note to Ben's people: he may also enjoy a cold frothy root beer to aid in the blogging. Take care of that too please.)

When I tell you the secret you'll be embarrassed you didn't think of it yourself because it's so obvious. Don't be like that - we all have our own special talents and I'm sure you're a good person.

By rearranging the letters in the phrase "Ben Blair The Executive" we get "Cute Venerable Exhibit". Clearly Ben stopped blogging because we as his audience failed to appreciate these aspects of his work. I for one vow to be more vocal in my praise of Ben's cuteness and look forward to the prompt resumption of posts at The Executive.

I'm Not Dead Yet Either

During a flight Saturday evening I was listening to Delta Airlines' CD selections. One bright spot was finding the soundtrack for Spamalot. It was in the Jazz section, which is amusingly indicative of the overall Delta Airlines experience. OK, it's amusing just to me…can we move on?

I had forgotten about the fantastic ballad Brave Sir Robin, which is available for your listening pleasure here. (Note that due to my iTunes linking incompetence this is the version from the film rather than the musical soundtrack and you'll have to scroll down the page to find the appropriate link.) When Denise and I saw Spamalot, David Hyde Pierce was Sir Robin. As you listen to the song think of him in that role with a look on his face somewhere between bemusement and mild constipation. Can you see why this was a Tony award winning musical?

Anyway, I listened to the song about forty eight times. That's not much of an exaggeration -- I'm very easily amused. I snorted the first time I heard one specific line and chuckled, snickered, or laughed each of the next forty seven times. Can you guess which line it is?

I will provide a fantastic prize* to the first commenter correctly identifying my favorite method of death that Sir Robin did not fear. Are you excited?




* Of course the prize will be a can of Spam, in spite of the fact that it is neither delicious nor animal. If you want good prizes, visit Gabby.

Delicious Sushi